I Looked For You in Light- Poem
When you told me:
I was the one who made your heart go mad
I felt a tingling in my stomach.
When your fingers played with my hair and your mouth whispered:
I felt a void when I thought you would not be with me.
My heart skipped a beat.
When your arms became a haven for me and your eyes conveyed:
We were meant to be together.
My world expanded and contracted around You.
What a beautiful chaos it was
That made me forget:
That You were but a bubble of my imagination.
That did not allow me to hide from you even when I wanted to.
That your confessions turned the tingling into a mold of poison that started from my stomach and lived in my head for like always.
I knew we were together but I never realized that I and you were together not you and me together.
I gave up looking for you when I was in the shadows and clouds of darkness because You were the reason I was there.
And you do not look for the murderer when you know he is breathing sitting behind you.
But I did try and try to look for You in the light as I believed or made myself believe that You were in the darkness so lightness must be your haven as well.
But, you crushed the prism of light for me and fashioned a new one for me that reflected just one light: dark and dull light
I could not find you in the light because you were never the reason I was in the light.
Your eyes could not hold the light when it was coming from someone else.
Your hands burned when you felt the warmth of my success.
Because you were a habitant of darkness who lived in darkness and who believed in prevailing darkness.
