I am sure you might have heard this sentence at least once in your life, “Let it go! You will make things worse!!!”
And it might have hurt you or made you angry because you only wanted to help, and it was what you were doing all along.
And above all, suddenly, the person who gave you this advice becomes your enemy (in your eyes, obviously).
What if I say that this is one of the best pieces of advice your trusted ones can give you?
Will you believe?
Sounds quite cynical, doesn’t it?
I get it, for I have been there. How can I make things worse? I will never hurt them through my actions, for I love them.
But I did hurt them, and it hurt me!
Turns out:
Love is not a remedy.
Love is not a cure.
Love is not an antidote.
Love is not always useful (most importantly).
You see, there are some people who cannot be cured or helped, for they don’t want to be cured. They want to stay in the same place for some reason. And if you do something to help them, they feel betrayed, cheated, or more hurt.
Okay, let’s rely on an example to understand this:
Your loved ones are hurting because of a lack of emotional strength or courage. You think you can give that courage and strength to them. But can you make a blind person see by describing a scene???
No, right!
Yet you try to make them see things that their eyes aren’t capable of seeing.
You try to make their situation better with your efforts…and your love.
But those efforts and love only put everyone in agonising pain.
Most importantly, it makes you sad and hopeless beyond words.
Long story short, they don’t change.
They remain in the same hell. And cherry on top, you are blamed for being insensitive and too outspoken. They get hurt because of you.
Maybe they just want you to accept everything, including them as they are.
Then, love or kindness doesn’t help you get over the fact that you are causing them more pain, and your love will only burn you with them.
And all of this doesn’t make you continue with your life.
But you forget that when someone makes the decision to compromise their values or themselves, what can you do to help them?
NOTHING!
All you can do is accept, be there for them (if needed), and move on.
So, it is this very one piece of advice that can save you, for it has saved me. Bless the person for telling me this!
“Let it go! You will make things worse.”
It won’t be easy, let me tell you that!
You will wonder:
How can I leave them behind?
And why would I when I can help?
But did you see them?
They were stubborn, weren’t they?
If they are willing to be in misery, you can’t do much about it. And if they are in misery, look at yourself, why are you in misery?
Why are you in hell when you can be somewhere else?
And if you can’t be somewhere else, why can’t you wear armour to protect yourself?
If you keep on investing, will your relationship change? Will it be better or worse?
Try to answer these questions, and you will finally see why you need to let it go!
You ARE making everything worse!
So,
Let everything that you can’t change go.
Let everyone who doesn’t listen to you go…with respect and love.
Let everything that you do not help stay the same.
Let everything happen.
And know:
It is your duty to try, but it is never your fault that everything or everyone stays the same.
It is your responsibility to help them. Likewise, it is your job to help yourself.
